CHRISTMAS PERFECT?



     I have this problem.  It's a big problem but God's been working on me long enough that I can now say -- five kids later -- there's hope!  You see, my heart tends to feel warmer and my smile tends to grow bigger when everything is, well, in its place.  You know, perfect !   But the problem is, nothing robs happiness at Christmas (or any other time of the year) faster than a mom, or dad, whose goal is perfection.

     A traditional, sticky gingerbread house is an excellent image of one of two things -- either perfection or child-like pleasure.  We can't have both!  If we are going to make eyes light up and hearts remember joy-filled, childhood moments, something has to give.

     The challenge is, it's not possible to have "perfect" anything with children -- and even if we could attain it, we'd have to achieve it by stealing joy from the ones we are trying to bless.

     When it comes to Christmas, I've learned that I need to put God, family and others first and remind myself that perfection is not important.  In fact, it's not even found in a hint of how Christmas began.

     Travel back with me, to the night the King of Heaven and Earth came to dwell among us...

     - Imagine Mary, giving birth in a stable . . . where is there any perfection in that, dear moms, who've experienced childbirth?

     - Imagine, Joseph, not even being able to provide a humble hotel room . . . where is there any perfection in that, dear dads, who live to provide for their wives?

     - Imagine, brand-new, infant Jesus, wrapped in old rags to try provide some warmth . . . where is there any perfection in that?

     God's plan was never perfection -- His plan was provision! 

     Nothing has changed in the last two thousand years . . . God still desires provision over perfection.

     I came across a beautiful adaptation of I Corinthians 13 this week, written by Sharon Jaynes, that I wanted to share with you ~

If I decorate my house perfectly with lovely plaid bows, strands of twinkling lights, and shiny glass balls, but do not show love to my family - I'm just another decorator.

If I slave away in the kitchen, baking dozens of Christmas cookies, preparing gourmet meals, and arranging a beautifully adorned table at mealtime, but do not show love to my family - I'm just another cook.

If I work at the soup kitchen , carol in the nursing home, and give all that I have to charity, but do not show love to my family - it profits me nothing.

If I trim the spruce with shimmering angels and crocheted snowflakes, attend a myriad of holiday parties, and sing in the choir's cantata, but do not focus on Christ - I have missed the point.

Love stops the cooking to hug the child.

Love sets aside the decorating to kiss the husband.

Love is kind, though harried and tired.

Love doesn't envy another home that has coordinated Christmas china and table linens.

Love doesn't yell at the kids to get out of the way.

Love doesn't give only to those who are able to give in return, but rejoices in giving to those who can't.

Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, and endures all things.

Love never fails.

Video games will break; pearl necklaces will be lost; golf clubs will rust.

But giving the gift of love will endure.

     Let's give our families the most wonderful Christmas ever -- full of love, selflessness and joy found in our Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ -- the greatest gift ever given.  And let's leave perfection out in the cold, where it belongs.

"Mercy, peace and love be

yours in abundance."

Jude 1:2

Smile

Smiles...they are free, they are beautiful, they are contagious, they don't expire, they don't run out...why don't we use them all the time?  Have you ever noticed from time to time, especially when life feels a little too full and busy, that you have had a very serious look on your face for a good part of the day.  Sometimes, for me, one of our children will draw my attention to it, by asking if something is wrong; or often it is simply by the act of smiling that I realize it has been a long day and maybe I haven't smiled much at all.  To me, that is an indication that my joy meter may be low.

Why bother smiling anyway?  Aside from the reasons already given above, I like the fact that smiles almost always double - it is wonderful to smile at someone you love and see their face light up as they smile back.  I know that I often take life too seriously, and as I glance around and see my precious family around me, I am reminded to relax and let go of the stresses of life and enjoy what I have been blessed with.  Consistently, when I am smiling, my children are smiling and happier too.  I want my children to remember their mom as someone who was JOY-filled!  Smiles and laughter play a big part in that - but as in so many other things in life, sometimes we have to DO IT before we FEEL IT!

I once read an article by mother of eight - Teri Maxwell, in which she wrote about the importance of choosing to smile even when she didn't want to.  She was sharing about a time of struggling through depression when she realized she was so low, that her children were rarely seeing her smile anymore.  She was asking God to heal her, but it wasn't happening instantly - so, she determined that from the moment she would leave her bedroom in the morning, there would be a smile on her face, whether she felt that way inside or not.  An amazing thing happened, as she tells the story - not only were her children amazed that she was smiling, she started to feel things change - slowly, one day at a time!  And, her children were so excited to see her happy that everyone else increased drastically in their joy and happiness!  What a testimony to the power of a smile.

Another thing I have observed with our family, is that when I am helping my children learn something; whether it is tying shoes, reading, baking, etc., they are so much more relaxed to learn from me if I am smiling and positive.  There are so many times it is just more "natural" to wear a frown, but I like what the character from the movie, Annie used to say ~ You're never fully dressed without a smile!  Whether we are lacking joy or just tired from lack of sleep, the habit of smiling is well worth growing in.

It really boils down to one of the fruits of the Spirit; don't just try to manufacture it on you own, ask the Holy Spirit to fill you with joy.  You can't be full of joy and not have it bubble up from deep within, it says in Galatians 5:22 that, "The fruit of the Spirit is love, JOY..."  One of my children has an ongoing tendency to try and act upset, even if he is happy on the inside; all I need to do to turn him around is to ask him if he has a smile hiding, and he can't help it - out it pops.  If the Spirit fills us with joy - we will be the same way, we won't be able to keep that smile hidden.

The next time you feel overwhelmed or down, instead of losing your cool or looking grumpy; ask the Lord to fill you with His Spirit, that you may walk out the day in His strength.  Then, try a smile - see if your whole day doesn't turn around!

II Corinthians 3:18 "We, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord's glory,

are being transformed into His likeness with ever-increasing glory,

which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit."