Nail Biting Worries

     Thoughts drifted in the back door of my mind -- totally unaware of the subtle change, I subconsciously began to chew on a fingernail.  A bit later I found myself irritated by a few simple incidents and chewing on the second fingernail.

     Old habits die hard. 

     By supper I had complete mutilated one hand and had started on the second.  What a stupid habit, I chided myself.  It took until bedtime to recognize the cause of my nail biting day -- I'd been worrying.  

     About what?  Nothing of great significance, but those dangerous "little concerns", if allowed to go undetected, can leave me worse off than the big ones.

     Once I recognized what was happening, I began to speak God's truth...God, let your peace, the one that's beyond what I can imagine, GUARD my heart and my mind in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 4:7)  My heart calmed and my mind fell silent!

     Somehow if my "radar for worry" isn't activated at all times these seemingly unimportant worries can take over and I find myself becoming overwhelmed with life.  I know this isn't the way God wants any of us to live -- but what are we to do?

     I picture a sweet child spinning and twirling with happy delight . . . Jesus was looking out for our best interest when he told us that, "Unless you CHANGE and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven."  (Matthew 18:3)

     We transform our thinking from that of a stressed adult to that of a carefree child.

     By His strength, not ours, we have to surrender these concerns to Him ~ ONE AT A TIME.  As worries come to our minds, we release them immediately - not ignore the issues; we still have to deal with working things through, but without the worry with which the enemy wants to weigh us down.  No wonder we're told in I Corinthians to take thoughts captive and make them obedient.

     If your mind is simmering with shadows and your thoughts are flying faster than a bird in flight, stop, let go and give God the freedom to work each problem through with you and for you!

"Pile your troubles on God's

shoulders - He will carry your

load, He will help you out."

Psalm 55:22

Abundance of Bread

     "Eating Holes in Wallets" screamed the bold type on the front page of the morning newspaper.  Another paper boasts, "Be prepared to fork over more cash before you pick up your dinner fork."  The articles go on to elucidate the events that again threaten to increase the burden to our homes and budgets. 

     More money for food?  Don't we pay enough already? Then the thoughts tumble even deeper and darker . . . What if there is not enough?  How can we stretch our dollars further than they already are? 

     I stop there -- the demands of the morning routine require that I thrust these thoughts aside and focus on the immediate needs of cereal bowls and juice glasses.  Questions are shelved till later.

    Later comes, and I find myself focused again on the headlines of the morning paper.  The weight of the daily news feels heavier than I care to admit -- the feelings of "not enough" are not new, but shadows of the past.  I stop and take those thoughts captive.  I sense a warning light flash that my thoughts are not lined up with God's truth, but it takes more self-discipline than usual to arrest them in my mind.  It must speak to the magnitude of their size. 

     "God," I cry out, "I don't want to carry this burden."

     "I know that it is not mine to carry -- you are the One who has, does, and always will provide for our family..."

     "REGARDLESS of food prices!"

     I feel the rest returning to my heart, and I am reminded of the verses I read a few days ago.  I pick up my brown-leather Bible and turn to the portion in Deuteronomy 8.  Yes, there it is . . . I settle into the plaid couch cushions, as warm sunshine floods over my shoulders and touches the pages of God's words to me.  It begins with the promise in verse 7 and whispers to me, "The Lord your God is bringing you into a good land -- a land with streams and pools of water, with springs flowing in the valleys and hills . . . a land where bread will not be scarce and you will lack nothing."

     This is the truth my heart has begged for!  His provision ALWAYS allows for inflation -- that is why He holds the title of FAITHFUL.  My heart soars with the lightness of springtime.  My God knows the beginning and the end, He knows what will be needed in the months ahead, and that is where I choose to fix my thoughts.

"My God will meet all your needs

according to His glorious riches

in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:19

Don't Worry, Be Happy

I paced the floor of our living room.  I felt like a caged lion.  The cold seemed to radiate from the outside, which further dampened the mood I was already comfortably settled into.  It didn't take long to find the name for the emotions I was drowning in -- worry. 

Worry; it meant I had taken the cares of my life from God's capable hands and put them back in my own hands . . . again.  Would I ever learn?  I asked myself.   Did I really think that my stewing over these items would make a positive difference?  Ultimately, worry meant I was focusing my thoughts on the enemy's lies for me, not God's truths.

I grabbed for my Bible and flipped to the passage I had read so many times.  "DO NOT be anxious about ANYTHING, but in everything, by prayer and petitions, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, WILL guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."  (Philippians 4:6&7)  That was the missing link - the peace was not there.  I knew that as I read that passage I often stopped at that verse and failed to read on.  As my eyes stumbled ahead on the lines, I realized God was showing more of His battle plan.  How to fight against the emotions of worry that tumbled around my head like black flies in the springtime.

"Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable -- if anything is excellent or praiseworthy -- think about such things." (Philippians 4:8)

That was it, I thought, as the triumph moved from my head to my heart.  A smile broke across my face as the dawning came . . . all the things I had allowed my mind to focus on while I worried had nothing to do with God's checklist of things to think about.

Is it true?

Is it noble?

Is it right?

Is it pure?

Is it lovely?

Is it admirable?

Is it excellent?

Is it praiseworthy?

If I had to say NO to even one of those questions, then I was not following God's plan.  And there was another important truth buried here - by worrying I was choosing to sin.  To go against what God had required of me meant that I had to become a slave to the enemy of my God.

It came full circle in my mind - right back to one of my favourite verses - "We take captive EVERY thought and make it obedient to Christ."  (II Corinthians 10:5)  If I was to importune each thought to go through the security check as meticulously as if in front of a guard at the airport, I would be in far more peaceful place in my mind. 

"God," I cried out, "Help me not to worry, but to take captive each thought, and then to be happy in You!"  The peace came, the worry left and my thoughts focused on the lovely once more.  Always God's Word had the way I needed to go -- always.

"Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?" Luke 12:25

Looking to the Future

How do you feel when you look to the future and what lies ahead for your family?  It may depend on how far you attempt to see, but what emotions surface first when you read that question about the future?  Is it anticipation?  Is it fear?  Is it excitement?  Is it dread?  It is important to know how we look to the future, because thoughts can simmer below the surface and affect how we deal with parenting in the present, either in positive or negative ways.  Allow me to illustrate.

If I were to look to the future with fear and dread, concerned that my 4 year old could become a rebellious teenager, how am I going to parent him now?  It will be out of unhealthy fear and possibly a desire to control his immature behaviour instead of a desire to shape and mold his heart.  Now, if I take that same 4 year old, but instead find my thoughts centered around looking to the future with anticipation and excitement for all that God has planned for him, what changes in me as a parent?  I gain the perspective that, although knowing there will be failures and bumps along the way, God has His hand on my 4 year old and I don't need to fear the future.  It suddenly sets me free to really enjoy these young years and trust the Lord with the years to come. 

Maybe that seems to obvious or simple, but I know from personal experience that the enemy is very subtle in the way he plants thoughts of worry in our minds.  It may be when we hear of a friend's teen becoming pregnant out of wedlock, or another who has been arrested.  It could be when we think back to our teen years and some of the mistakes we made, realizing desperately that we want to keep our kids from that same path.  Regardless of where the worry might come from, it is so important to take hold of all that we find weighing us down and GET RID OF IT!

How, you might ask?  Or, I have tried and it comes back?  The HOW is that we CHOOSE to give anything and everything that causes us concern and worry, over to God.  I Peter 5:7, in the Amplified version, says, "Casting the whole of your care (all your anxieties, all your worries, all your concerns, once and for all) on Him, for He cares for you affectionately and cares about you watchfully." Casting, as we have said before, means throwing it far from us and not taking it back - saying out loud if needed, "God, I have been worrying about ___________ and   ___________ and  ______________, but I know that these are not my burdens to carry.  You have said that You care for me and that I need to give these cares to You.  So right now, even though I am tempted to worry about these things, I choose to leave it in Your hands and rest in You.  Thank you for caring for me, in Jesus' name, Amen."

What if you have done that and the worry still comes back?  Well, of course it does!  The enemy tempted you before to worry about those things and it worked, so why wouldn't he try again?  Take Philippians 4:6&7, "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which trancends all understanding, will guard  your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."  Know that once you have given these worries to God, thank Him that He is in control, look to the future with your trust in Him and let His peace guard your heart and mind.

Everything We Need

God has promised to give us everything we need! We, as parents, will do whatever it takes to make sure that every need is met that our children have (needs not wants). Yet as much as we know this in our heads I find in day to day conversations, it is evident that this vital information has not made it to our hearts. There is a very quick test you can do to see where you are at with this - Did you worry about anything today?

More times than not, the answer can be yes - but it doesn't have to be. Jesus told us, in Matthew 11:29, that, "(His) yoke is easy and (His) burden in light." And that as we come to Him, He can take those things from us. Sounds easy but it requires faith and action from us. It means we need to truly understand what God has promised, so that we can trust Him to do what He has said He will do.

I love the verses in Matthew 7 that lay this out so plainly - as a parent I believe this strikes the heart of glimpsing the Father's love for us. "Which of you, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for fish, will give him a snake? If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask Him." As a mom, I can read that and confidently know that if one of our children were truly in need of food, of course I would want to give them something good. Therefore I need to be resting in my Heavenly Father, that even more so when I have a need, He will provide what is required.

I have noticed an interesting trend with our younger children that seems to fade away as they approach the teen years - every once in a while they think that they are not going to get fed. Have you ever noticed that in your home? Sometimes it sounds like, "I am soooo hungry. Are you going to make lunch today?" or "If I don't eat soon I think I might die, what if you don't remember to make supper?" The part I find fascinating is that since beginning parenting almost 13 years ago, I have NEVER, not once, forgotten to feed one of my children. That means I have been consistent (or faithful, if you will) for over 14,000 meals - wow! Now for my children that may doubt a meal is coming, their experience level may land somewhere around 8,000 meals but you would still think that would translate into rest and belief that they will be fed ~ but it doesn't always. When they start to "feel" the hunger and the don't "see" the promise of food before their eyes, they start to worry...have we not done the same thing with our Heavenly Father?

When we know that God has faithfully met our needs in the past, continues to provide for the needs of today, why would we worry that He will "forget" tomorrow's? Because we are like the younger children who are still growing in trusting our Heavenly Father to provide EVERYTHING WE NEED.

So try something new - take a verse like Philippians 4:19 that says, "My God will meet all your needs according to His glorious riches in Christ Jesus", or the verse above from Matthew 7, or any other one like it that speaks of God's promise for your provision, and write it out and stick it in a prominent place. The next time that you feel worry start to come to you, go to those verses (which are the living, active Word of God) and speak them out loud. Take them to your situation and say out loud, "My God has promised to meet all my needs according to His riches", or "How much more will my Father in Heaven give me good gifts because I am asking Him." The darkness cannot stay where there is light and worry cannot linger where there is trust in our Heavenly Father.

Do not let fear or worry reign when God wants to give you everything you need!