HOORAY FOR WEAKNESS

 

     You've sat in one of those groups of moms, haven't you?  You know, the circle of chatting women who are sharing the heroics of their perfect kids, modeling the perfect hair-do, while all you seem to be able to pull off is trying to subtly check your breath to see if you remembered to brush your teeth before staggering out the door this morning?

     I've been there.  In fact, I own a few different sizes of that t-shirt, because you know what?  Life can be hard as a mom.

     Every stage of mothering brings new challenges that we've never been through.

     Every child brings new difficulties that we've never faced.

     Every day has problems of its own.

     So...do you want to know how to conquer the emotions of those circles of seemingly "perfect" women?  Do you want to know the secret of silencing the lies that whisper, no SCREAM, in your ears on those hard days?  You need to say HOORAY FOR MY WEAKNESS!

     I don't give this advice lightly.  In fact, it's taken me a long time to reach the point of confidence in my own weaknesses to say this.  And, it's not just my own opinion; it's actually biblical.

     Paul, the "super-apostle" of the New Testament, experienced an epiphany moment with God of this very same nature, in II Corinthians 12:9.  Look at the conversation that occurred between God and Paul...
      "But He (God) said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, my power is made perfect in weakness.'  Therefore I (Paul) will BOAST all the more gladly about my WEAKNESSES, so that Christ's power may rest on me."


     Do you hear Paul's determination swelling as the excitement in his heart grows?  He got it!  And as moms, we need to get it!

     God will rush to our side, bringing His awesome power to our situations when we are, ultimately, bragging about our failures and struggles...not when we are touting about the greatness of ourselves or our children.


     Be honest with yourself -- who do you enjoy hanging out with more?  The mom who tells you how you too can "have it all together" if you just do X, Y & Z, OR the mom who shares with a humble smile how she forgot to pick up her child from the bus stop three afternoons this week?  It's a no-brainer, we all find safety in the honest, real mom.

     We all have strengths and weaknesses; and both are needed in our homes, our marriages and our friendships.  Share from your strength in gentle ways to help a friend, but be equally willing to let your hair hang down - long and shaggy - and be real about your weaknesses.  You may be amazed at the doors that will open, the lies that will stop pounding in your head and the joy that will return to your steps.

     You are an AWESOME mom!  You are the one God chose for your children!  You have what it takes IF you combine it with God's amazing power as you say HOORAY for weakness today.

"If I must boast, I will

boast of the things that show 

my WEAKNESS."

II Corinthians 11:30

The Steam of the Stove

As I leaned into the heat of stove, I could feel my shoulders slumped over from the weight of the day.  The steam on my face, from the pot I was stirring, reminded me of the feelings I was fighting inside.  There was no question - this had been an arduous day for this mother's heart.  I recognized the symptoms that were flashing "overwhelmed" in my head, and I wondered if I even had the strength to finish the day.  As I sighed, I took a moment trying to evaluate where the greatest pressures were coming from, and I quickly realized the answer that I had been fearful of...EVERYWHERE. 

I lingered over my post at the stove longer than what was required, in an desperate effort to regain composure that would allow me to enter back into the world of life that was raging behind me.  The ring of the phone seemed like the emergency sound from a fire truck, the bickering of the kids imitated the kerfuffle of a barnyard, and the house, well it was reminiscent of a tornado having recently passed through.  While surveying the damage, I asked myself, How did life get so out of control?  Where did I go wrong?  I quickly heard the answer - I didn't go wrong, this is life at its fullest.  Real life, not ideal life!  If given the choice of this or silence, in my deepest of hearts I would CHOOSE this, chaos and all!

The next step was harder; knowing this was the life I wanted and needed to embrace, I still had to find the resources that were required to finish out the day.  Not just to merely survive, but to do it well.  Again, I found my heart staring at a fork in the road - two choices of where the strength was going to come from. Was I going to reach inside myself to where I was dry and empty or was I going to reach up to where my Father God was ready with His unlimited supply of strength? 

I CHOSE to reach up. 

God, I sighed, I need the resources for strength that comes only from You.  Fill me fresh and show me how to love my children in the midst of the confusion I now face.

I would love to tell you that lightening flashed and everything was made perfect, but that would not be true.  Slowly my heart quieted and my joy was restored.  The sun began to break through the heavy clouds in our home, and God proved true to His Word again.  I am so thankful that these are the promises He has given us to draw on, claim, and live out in our homes...may we be encouraged to press on!

"He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak." Isaiah 40:29

It "Ain't" Just the Milkmen Anymore

                                                                                         

There are increasing numbers of women being drawn away from their marriages these days, and it "ain't" just because of good-looking milkmen anymore!  We are living at a point in history where the whole world, and all it has to "offer", is literally, at our fingertips.  The temptations we face, no matter what our occupations may be, are greater by far than what I understand the "milkmen" days were like. 

We can say we are strong and not interested, and most of us would be telling the truth; but it doesn't matter, the enemy has been studying us for a long time and he knows our weaknesses.  The Bible warns us in I Peter 5:8 that we are to, "Be self-controlled and alert.  Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour."  We are all at risk.

Many people, myself included, have looked back at the Garden of Eden and criticized Adam and Eve for their fatal mistake in taking the fruit from the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil (oh, to be able to live without the knowledge of evil ).   But I must say that I don't "blame" Adam and Eve like I used to; I have come far enough in life to realize that we are ALL open to the enemy's temptations, and he is very cunning in his methods and timing.  We are a generation desperately in need of self-control, support from godly friends and a determination to be alert to the traps we may be exposing ourselves to. 

One strategy that God gives us in guarding ourselves against temptation, comes from Matthew 7:3&5, "Why do you look a the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?...You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye."  This scripture shows us that we have to examine our own hearts on an ongoing basis, and ask the Holy Spirit to reveal where the "planks" are in our own lives.  Satan will try to discourage us from looking at ourselves, for two reasons:  One is because he knows if we start paying attention to what is out of order in our own lives we might ask God to put it straight, and two is that we will not be as apt to be judging and critical of others.  It is too easy to look at someone else's "speck" and feel pious, while not realizing we are being led away from the real problem - ourselves.

It is of utmost importance that we don't see ourselves "above" anyone else and their struggles or sin - it is BUT for the grace of God, go I.  When we hear of someone "falling into sin", we CANNOT allow ourselves even a fleeting thought of how we would not have been capable of doing the same thing.  That is the temptation of looking at the specks!  If we can only see the sin of others, then we are not being honest about our own weaknesses and looking for the planks in our own lives.

What are some of the possible planks?  Ask God to show you and He will! 

Be sure to guard yourself against letting your heart even start down a path you know you shouldn't go down.  Proverbs 4:23 says, "Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life."  We have to be so careful...when I refer back to the milkman days; I am really serious about it.  Back then, the temptations for married women seemed far less; the man who placed the milk at your doorstep, maybe the mailman, or some of the friendships as married couples, but for the most part living was somewhat simple and safe. BUT NOW, we are inundated with temptations - we have the option of a career outside the home that can place us in close relationships with men.  We can find anything we want and don't want to find on the Internet at any time of night or day.  We have social networking that can put us in touch with every man we may have known in the past and the present.  Even texting and email can provide ways of communicating with men on a more than healthy level.

All of us, I am sure, can look to at least a few examples that stem from friendships we have had, where one of the married persons have "walked away" for someone else.  This doesn't happen overnight, my friends - it happens as one person is slowly drawn towards someone other than their spouse. It may be that they just want to "get to know them better" or "reconnect with them", and the initial intent can be quite innocent.  We have to recognize that if we don't see the temptation or the trap that Satan is weaving for us, we will blindly go after the fruit that looks shiny and appealing!  DON'T even entertain those thoughts.  Why else would we be instructed in I Timothy 2:22 to, "FLEE the evil desires of youth, and pursue righteousness."?

Remember that our hope is found in GOD ALONE, and He has promised in I Corinthians 10:13 that, "No temptation has seized you except what is common to man.  And God is faithful; He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear.  But when you are tempted, He will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it."  One of the best pieces of advice I ever heard on temptation was that when we see we are being tempted, we should ask the Lord, "What is the way out?", and then truly be prepared to take it.  Also be sure you have at least one friend (female) who will speak boldly into your life and point out potential areas of weakness. 

There is a song called Slow Fade, by Casting Crowns, which speaks of the temptation that any one of us could face IF we are not careful.  Some of the words are here...

     The journey from your mind to your hands
     Is shorter than you're thinking
     Be careful if you think you stand
     You might just be sinking

     It's a slow fade when you give yourself away
     It's a slow fade when black and white are turned to gray
     Thoughts invade, choices are made, a price will be paid
     When you give yourself away
     People never crumble in a day
     It's a slow fade

Please don't let yourself fade slowly into any relationship that will take you away from God's best for you and your family.  We are not as strong as we may think we are - I wish there were a BELL I could RING LOUDLY to help you see how significant this is.  Please take at least a moment to ask the Lord to show you anything or anyone that you need to cut off, in order to protect yourself from making the biggest mistake in your life!  Also, consider sending a link of this article to other women you know - we need to be helping one another every step of the way.  I am praying for you.