A yellow line and two pairs of shoes . . . this picture causes my face to break into a big grin; it also yells loudly of the variance of personalities in our home. As you may already know, having more than one child allows us, as parents, an inside look at how differently God designs each human being.
If a sign said "Don't cross the yellow line" then likely I'd see five different responses, since I have five different children. One child would put their toes right up to the line but wouldn't dream of crossing over, another would go right past that line, and then three more would land somewhere in between depending on how the wind was blowing.
Does this mean God made a mistake when he designed some of my children?
Does it mean I have parented some of them well but failed with the others? (possibly, but not my point)
Or could it mean that each one is created uniquely with their own set of challenges we have to work on together?
The sooner we accept that each of our children come pre-wired with their own strengths and weaknesses, the sooner we'll embrace the task of parenting each one AS THEY ARE CREATED!
If God is able to ensure that no two snowflakes are ever the same, isn't He far more likely to pour out His immense creativity and uniqueness into our children?
I admit it took a while for me to realize that my consistency with raising each of our children was not yielding similar results, but once I accepted that each child was personalized to their own ways, I began to enjoy it a little more. Some of the best advice I remembering hearing in the early days came from the Ezzos when they said, "We don't lower the standards of behaviour depending on the child, but we bring each child to the standard." That was HUGE for me!
Once we see and understand that each child can't be compared to his or her siblings, let alone "Molly" or "Tommy" down the street, we can be set free to see each of our children exactly as God created them to be. We'll see that although we have our work cut out with each one, it'll be in different areas of training. Where one child finds it easy to be outgoing and polite, they may struggle with telling the truth. Another child may feel close to death when they have to greet a stranger but never dream of being dishonest. This doesn't make one child "better" than another -- but simply set apart for what God has planned for that specific child (and what we need to correct as we train them).
Don't be discouraged if you have a child (or two) that's threatening to drive you around a bend -- God chose you as their parent because He KNEW you'd have what it takes to train, equip and raise this (these) child(ren) in the ways they need to go. Don't give up or grow soft . . . now is the time to keep the standard raised and encourage them to reach out for that goal!
"Before I shaped you in the womb,
I knew all about you. Before you saw
the light of day, I had holy plans for you."
Jeremiah 1:5
ha ha ha! We have a yellow line around our pool here in the city. You can run the short bit between the line and the pool edge to jump in. Brian (3 yrs) wanted to run from so far away to jump (yes, he's fearless) and I had to keep repeating the rule. His interpretation: Stand on the opposite side of the line with his toes touching it - as far away as one can go and still be "on" the line. My oldest at 3 would never have stood right on the line as she was asked. I love that photo because it pretty much sums it up for me too. :)
ReplyDeleteThanks for that quote about bringing them TO the standard. Good stuff.